The Last Breakfast (... when the kids are grown)

 

Today my youngest son moved out, heading off to university.  I made him one last breakfast-- toasted bagel, grapes and a protein/fruit shake.  It was only partially eaten, as he was in a rush to pack things before leaving.

And so I am now an "empty nester", a stage of life I am still processing.  It is something that feels bitter sweet.  Of course every parent wants their children to grow up into independent adults, capable of exercising their own autonomy and face life's adventures of their own.  But for every parent I'm sure this stage seems to come way, way too quickly.  Kids grow up so fast!  

The daily habits of cooking meals, packing lunches, cleaning clothes, walking/driving kids to school, friends' houses, sporting activities, doctor's appointments, work, etc. have been such an integral part of my fatherhood identify for the past quarter of a century. And now these duties, along with their memories, are a long shadow cast by a previous stage of my life.  

I am trying to see the silver lining in this parental transition in terms of its potential to be a catalyst for my own growth and development.  It is an opportunity for me to take on new hobbies and projects that I did not have time to pursue before. Perhaps I will travel more.  I scaled back on attending work-related conferences over the past decade, after my divorce, so I could better manage juggling career and parental duties.  And I have never taken a solo vacation in my life, so perhaps that is something I should experience.  No doubt I can fill up the extra time with more research and writing as that has always been an integral part of my life.  But at the same time I know I need to work on attaining a better work-life balance.   

Fatherhood has been, and no doubt will continue to be, among the most formative life events in my growth and development, with a profound impact on my emotional wellbeing.  The world my boys face, like the future all previous generations have faced, is full of uncertainty and stress, along with valuable opportunities and hidden treasures.  I hope the paths they choose brings them adventure, meaning and fulfillment, and when adversity crosses their path they can always count on me for a compassionate ear and support.

As for me, at home it is now just Moe and I.  And who knows what the future will bring for us.

  

The "mighty" Moe!

Cheers, 

Colin